Amazon Createspace self-publishing DRAMA.

Self-publishing can be full of drama. Earlier this week I submitted my book, PickleWeasel Picture Riddles, to Amazon's CreateSpace for review. They approved it and I ordered my proofs. And then...I decided to make a teeny, tiny change to the interior file: I added page numbers to the bottom of each page and then resubmitted the book for review.

They sent me this email:

This be a troll-move.

For those who do not know it, CreateSpace is Amazon's 'print-on-demand' company. In this email they are telling me they won't approve my book interior (after already approving it). Because the answers are upside down. And because it's two books in one. Or something. To be honest, I can't even "can't even" that one.

The struggle is real.

GUYS. IT'S A RIDDLE BOOK. The answers are supposed to be upside down.

Also there's bonus flippable animation in the top right corner because it's fun for kids. All this is written on the back cover and in the book description.

You know those violins in the shower scene in Psycho? I had those in my soul.

I called up CreateSpace and explained everything to a patient and polite person named "Anthony". Anthony insisted that an actual human person does look over each and every book. When I asked why it was first approved and then not, he said that one person notices things that another person doesn't.

Me: "So it's a subjective process then?"

Anthony: "Uh....it's not supposed to be. But it happens."

He promised to resubmit it for me, and to plead my case. He said it would take about two business days. I did warn him that I have a small but feisty social media army on my side.

The next day, another email:

Ashley is also very polite.

All that Dramazon for nada. And today, look what arrived:

Real live in-the-flesh-books. 

They are so pretty I want to sleep with them under my pillow.
I guess these should be ready to go on sale anytime...maybe I should wait until after Thanksgiving.

Have you guys started your Christmas shopping yet?

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